Episode 383: How To Motivate Yourself To Change Your Behavior

I came across a Ted Talk by cognitive neuroscientist Tali Sharot about how to motivate yourself to change your behavior. And then I did what I always do. I took it, ran with it, and made it into something actors can actually use.

And here's something I want you to think about before we dive in. This core work applies directly to character building too. How would your character motivate themselves to change their behavior? How do you motivate yourself to hit the behavior of the character you're portraying? While you're working on making a better life for yourself, you're also making yourself a better actor.

1. Lead With What You Want, Not With Your Fear

Fear might get your attention. Mine can be quite loud and annoying. But it rarely keeps you moving. What you want to do is focus on the version of you that feels lighter, calmer, more capable. Your brain is actually wired to move toward desire. So paint the picture so clearly that you can almost walk right into it.

2. Make the Reward Immediate, Even If the Goal Is Long Term

Your brain loves instant wins. So give yourself one. A tiny celebration after you train, take a class, do a warmup, send an outreach email. Just let yourself feel good. Put a gold star in your planner. Small rewards trick your nervous system into believing the change is actually paying off. This comes straight from neuroscience, by the way. Reward yourself. Don't punish yourself.

3. Break the Habit Into Something So Small You Can't Talk Yourself Out of It

When I decided to re-up my workout routine, I started with 10 minutes. I said, I can do anything for 10 minutes. Something that felt almost torturous at first became easy. Four and a half years later I'm still doing that same exercise.

The principle is simple. How can you talk yourself out of one page of script work? Five minutes of meditation? One outreach email? Tiny steps create momentum because you stop negotiating with yourself. You're just doing the next doable thing.

And on that note, stop negotiating with yourself entirely. Make a decision and stick to it.

4. Surround Yourself With People Who Reflect Your Highest Self Back to You

Inspiration is contagious. Support is contagious. Courage is contagious. Spend time with people who remind you who you are becoming, not who you have been. Let their belief in you rub off on you until it feels like your own.

I see this every week in my classes. I'm teaching them, but they remind me what courage looks like. What consistency looks like. What it looks like to schedule your week so it reflects your dreams, not your fear.

Let that one sit with you.

5. Borrow Energy From Your Future Self

And here's the thing that stopped me cold. This cognitive neuroscientist is saying the exact same thing I talk about in my future self work. Picture the version of you who lives this change effortlessly. The one who feels grounded, consistent, confident. Ask what that version of you would choose in this moment. Let them lead.

When you act from your future instead of your fear, the behavior shift sticks.

A Small Favor

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